Dating older men in
Here, 8 women who have dated or are dating older men explain what it's really like."I'm the happiest I've ever been.
The age gap is 21 years - I know, it seems very scandalous.
At the time I didn't feel like I was being taken advantage of.
I definitely felt like I had autonomy, but now looking back, I can see a little bit of his skittishness.
Instead, when they looked at me, all they saw was my young good looks. That's really all I was to them, my appearance, and that was the only thing about me of value to them. It was weird." "My boyfriend is 30 years older than me, we have been together nine years.
"I finally got wise and stopped dating much older guys, and if I had a time machine I'd go back and warn my younger self against doing it because in the same way it's a trope that rich guys hate it when gold diggers want them for their financial market value, I hated it that they just wanted me for my looks." "Dated someone with an 11 year age gap. One of the things I noticed with him is that he doesn't 'allow' me to do things, I am an adult and I can hang out, drink, socialise, and be friends with whoever I want to be. We don't argue over petty shit, if there is an issue we can sit down, talk it out like adults and come up with a solution (80% of the time - don't get me wrong after nine years there have been a few big blow outs).
Maybe he was manipulating me, maybe he wasn't, I never actively felt like he was but I was basically a child." "I eventually realised that while I was seeing older men as these mature, refined, more stable and interesting people, they were not seeing me as a person in the same way.
He basically consistently spoke down to me and ridiculed me for being young.
Ya know, he's older and wiser and I'll understand someday....
"My mother wasn't that happy at first, because when she found out about him, I was graduating high school and moving in with him on the other side of the country.
After I moved here though, she's making an effort to be nice to him.
I can't say we have really worked this out so much as slowly met in the middle.