Aspies and dating ben chaplin dating
We are so much closer, because we think in the same way. I don’t feel like I’m broken or wrong any more, as he shares all of my ‘oddities’! I wish I had known how easy it is to date someone on the spectrum when I was younger.My ex has also found a non-autistic girlfriend and is much happier now, so it’s worked out well for us both.Today’s article comes from a guest writer, an autistic woman who wishes to remain anonymous. Ellie’s got some very interesting things to say about autism and romantic relationships, and how, after years of struggling, she found a relationship that works for her.Her article opens with the firm statement ‘I will only date guys with autism/Asperger’s now.’ My first thought was ‘wow, that’s really going to narrow your dating pool’. I’ve got lots of friends on the autism spectrum, and it would be a relief to date someone who I didn’t have to explain issues like sensory overload and literal thinking to.However, it’s clear that Ellie has very good reasons for this, and that it’s right for her. I simply haven’t met a woman on the autism spectrum who is a similar age to me, single, and interested in women.
Dubin also highlights the positive qualities that many people on the autism spectrum possess, and that most people look for in their partners ‘loyalty and devotion… a none conformist and original personality’ (Dubin, , p.116).I don’t like to admit defeat and I tried so hard to ignore the issues and keep my mouth shut, just going along with things.I would go to therapists or take anti-depressants to try and ‘fix’ myself and make it work between us.When you first meet someone, their differences can seem endearing and funny and you are willing to overlook certain issues and keep quiet.Especially if previous relationships haven’t worked out.
Near the end of my last relationship I became really depressed and ultimately suicidal from trying to force things to work all the time and knowing that something was missing. I’m sure his ego took a huge battering trying to share a home with me, as we just couldn’t properly connect and had different needs. We had a nice home, got on well with our families, didn’t have big arguments, no one was cheating or doing anything nasty.